Who am i?

the title should be: who am i now, since i don't actually have a definite identity.

but for now, lostutopian is:

1. no longer a Christian not even a deist, but my philosophy mostly aligns with deism. i do things because it is the right thing to do not because i am told to do it. i do things not for money but for the welfare of my fellow human beings. i retired from christianism because it failed to answer new questions in my life and i just don't see a clearer picture of god from that perspective. let me just clear things that i still believe in god it is just that i view/understand him differently. and if it is not boastful to say that i have a better/clearer view of god.

2. i was born to be a programmer, an analyst by heart.

3. never smoked a single cigarette.

4. i don't thirst for starb***** coffee.

4. it makes me smile when i see good things happen like when i see people helping each other for nothing in return.

5. it gives me hope to meet people who thinks otherwise of this world, or in short thinks just like me. makes me feel like i am not alone. it actually is very rare to find such people. in my lifetime i have found only 2 persons who also see the world as i am. one is my brother and another i just met a few months ago, i tell you it is very rare. most people just don't care about the problems of the world or are blind to these. some see the problem but don't act on them, they think it is not their responsibility, i think they're just here to pray and save themselves -- what a selfish view. they do things(as it is written in the bible) to save themselves from hell, very selfish. why not do the right thing just because you want to help others. can't we at least forget about ourselves and let us solve the problems of this world collectively.

6. it makes me feel hopeless when i see violence, injustice, unjust treatment(and many more...)

7. lastly, i am lost in this world filled with madness, illogical reasoning, gun hoe people, self loving people, hierarchical structure of society and self preserving intentions(and many more...).